Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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