super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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