Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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