I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
