So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
It's just like the Real World with babies
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
