no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
