Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize