its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
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