At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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