You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
