How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
