I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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