At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
