Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
