I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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