ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
