Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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