me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
