well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize