he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize