you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Randomize
