If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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