is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Randomize
