Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
