Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Randomize
