u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize