I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Randomize
