people are starting to question the shark bite story
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
