She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
