chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
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