dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
