he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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