we have officially lost it.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize