i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Me too!
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
