One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
