Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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