Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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