champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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