You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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