Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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