Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
