Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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