Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
