In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
