Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
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I wanna throw up and cum in that order
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
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