'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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