I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
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I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
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The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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