I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
