We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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