i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
