that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement 😭😂
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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