I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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